In which I get terribly confused and lament my lost youth...

It's been ages since I thought about writing anything down. And for the solo (or maybe two or three readers, because thank you siblings) set of eyes joining my adventures, be warned: I shall fill this blog with the most mundane and everyday happenings of my not-exciting life.
Avert your eyes should boring blog posts fill you with despair.


That warning made, I was prompted to put some words down because something happened two weeks ago that made me simultaneously sad, flattered and ultimately confused. I was crossing the street to get to my bus-stop when this council van says hello to me. I mumbled hi in return. Quick glance up in case I know the person (never, not in 14 years as an immigrant anyway) and saw the driver was some guy. I figured, oh, OK, maybe he knows some black girl who wears glasses, right,.....then he pulls a move straight out of creepy-older-married man-perving-on-16-year-old-me-in-school-uniform by proceeding to slowly drive and then stop directly opposite me by the bus stop. Cue holding up traffic for a good 20 seconds while he stared and I very fixedly looked hard into the distance.....

Friends and neighbours, a man perving on me in the street hasn't happened in donkey years. And I was wearing my boring work trousers and grey shapeless winter jacket, so my first (flattered) thought was, gosh, I've still got it, swiftly followed by (sadly), this dude has me mixed up with someone, and boy, has it been THAT long since I got random male attention that some grubby looking randomer should make me feel flattered? Then confusion as I realised the guy was being creepy and I just wanted him to eff  off as he was holding up my bus, which I could see 6 cars behind him....

You see, once upon a time, in the arrogance of being a teenager, some guy stopping to ask if I needed a lift was only irritating. For some reason, I guess school uniforms really bring out the creeps and even at 14, I'd ask if his wife also wanted a lift! Once, (this was much later, I wasn't 14!) walking home from college, I accepted a "lift" only for the guy to ask me on the inevitable date. So I figured, what the hell and cue a few days later and a flimsy excuse to the parents, he picked me up for an afternoon meet-up. Can I say, it's amazing what the mind remembers. He was a real gent, opened the car door for me, very polite, but the minute I got in the car and had a good look at him, it was always going to go south. For starters, I'd broken my own rule about lifts from guys. Secondly, looking at him without the sun in my eyes he looked (to my then 18 year old self) an ancient 30.... He suggested going to a popular drinking spot, so I hastily said I had to be home in an hour and he gave me such a sad look. He just wanted to get a drink somewhere nice. After making sure I had taxi money in my purse in case it all went bad, I said OK (ah, youth) and dude was true to his word, we went (where I'd have been in trouble had anyone who knew my parents spotted me) and.....had two cokes.
He then proceeded to put me off strange lifts for life by eating the groundnuts and crisps that came with the Cokes with his mouth open....and also bore me off by talking about his business and then confessing randomly in the middle of my boredom about his 7 year old child with some girl who cared about very much even though he didn't get on with their mother. Yeah. At that point I figured, I'm too young and green for this meeting strangers adventure.

Now unfortunately for me, and I confess this freely, I've been programmed to automatically be deferential to elders. This is generally OK, especially when dealing with cranky older people where it can soften things, but it also means I struggle to be assertive when someone's older. In this lost afternoon date, it means that this guy thought by taking me to see his business, I'd be impressed. I couldn't say no (curse that respect thing) and he diligently swung by his offices in town (with no traffic in Lusaka so you can tell how long ago this was), where my presence gave some gossip to his secretary and the other person there whose gender I can't even remember.

Funny, I was obviously a kid compared to this guy. He must have been looking for a wife, showing off his business, talking about his child to a girl he just met. Or maybe he just wanted to see if I'd be up for some fun, who knows, I certainly didn't get confused or  flustered like I did two weeks ago. Naw, I was miss cool cat, thinking in my youthful arrogance that unsolicited male attention would forever be mine.. Lol

The date ended with him asking for my number (the days before the whole world had phones or social media) so I said, no I don't think my parents would like that (house line) and I didn't think it was a good idea to meet again.

He wasn't happy but didn't push it. Maybe he had other girls lined up, but I prefer to think he was just a gent. A gent with poor table manners and very boring but a gent.

Hmm, I just wrote an entire blog about a 2-hour date I had when I was 18!

And that's pretty much how I realised how freaking long its been since then.

I sure don't get any attention these days. And certainly not with kids fighting and a bored teenager at my side.

I wouldn't dream of taking a random chance like that these days (as if I'd get the opportunity), but I wouldn't mind that 18 year old body again, as my busted knees remind me only too often of how much older I am.

But I'll take consolation that people in work genuinely thought I was 26! Haha hoho.

That week I also took